Things have been definitely been moving along the last couple of weeks. I had my 38 week checkup this morning and I am 3 to 4 cm dilated. Last week I was 2 cm and the week before that she didn't note anything significant so things are in motion for Josiah to make his debut. I had an ultrasound done today as well to check on Josiah's position and to get an estimate on his weight. He is head down, which is great! They are estimating his weight to be about 6lbs.
So, unless the Lord has other plans in mind, I am scheduled to be induced on Tuesday, February 5th.
Gulp.... that is kind of scary. Mostly just because I don't know what is going to happen when Josiah gets here. There are so many unknowns it seems with Trisomy 18. There are the good kind of unknowns, where these babies are strong and prove everyone who says "incompatible with life" wrong. And then there is are other unknowns..... will be be breathing? Will his heart be strong enough to survive delivery? Will we get to meet Josiah? Will he come home with us?
I am thankful to have the hope that surrounds some of these unknowns.... I never would have even thought that there would be a possibility of bringing Josiah home back when we first received his diagnosis. Now, I just have to admit that I don't know what is going to happen. I really have no idea. The Lord does though and we can rest in that. I remind myself again as we enter the end of this part of our journey of Psalm 139. Josiah is fearfully and wonderfully made, just exactly as he is. He was made for a purpose and God knows what that is even if we can't see how or why or anything but the next few minutes in front of us. As I was reading over that passage again, I was brought to verse 16:
" Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them the days that were formed for me, when as yet there were none of them."
What a timely reminder today.... Josiah is His workmanship and his big life, no matter how long the days will be are all perfectly in His plan.
We continue to pray for time with Josiah and are so thankful for all of you who are constantly praying with us for him. Thank you so much for your support and love through this journey. We are so thankful to know that we have had constant love, prayer, support and encouragement through these trials. From losing Owen, to carrying and loving Josiah for these past few months there are just no words to express our gratitude to each of you for the ways in which you have loved us and blessed us.
I am not sure what these next days will hold.... I am having lots and lots of contractions and they have obviously been doing something! I don't know if Josiah will wait until next week or if he will come earlier on his own, but I am spending these last days cherishing each of his kicks and wiggles not knowing how much time we have together. It has truly been a blessing carrying this little bundle of energy. He has impacted our lives in ways we never could have imagined after losing Owen and in spite of the heartache that may await us I am blessed to be his Mommy.
Thank you all for your continued prayer and care for family. I will keep you posted on what happens!